The Anvil Fell

Remember in that post a day or so ago when I spoke of having a fear of failure, and thought that there was always a chance that a passing anvil was going to come crashing down on my world.

Yeah, thought you did. Well, funny thing.

Today, it fell.

The jobs that were about to be posted - the chaplain positions that I and several others have been salivating over for the last several months and working our collective butts off to get our applications ready - just went poof!

Near as I can figure, there's some sort of power struggle going on between my boss and the big whigs at national headquarters. They are saying, "Thanks, but we already have tons of qualified applications. We don't want anymore, least of all the guys you WANT to have the job!" While my boss is disagreeing vocally (and in NSFW language, I might add. Nothing is more amusing than watching a chaplain cuss like a sailor!)

Meanwhile, one of the patients with whom I had made the most progress just got himself booted out of the substance abuse program for testing positive and having opiate based pain-killers (that he got from THIS FACILITY!). Still, there's a zero tolerance order in place, and he's gone. I told him where he could get some homeless assistance, since he has nowhere to go and no one to care for him once he gets there.

And, finally, I had a consult with a schizophrenic patient who has melanoma that spread to his lungs. Terminal prognosis, but there's nothing in place to care for his pain or provide even palliative care. I'm going full on patient advocate here, and am on the verge of going postal. He's not in any condition to speak for himself, so I'm working with his social worker. Hopefully we can get him some help.

Oh, remember the office struggle over here? First I was moving, then not, then I was going to share an office, then not. Well, I'm in an empty office with boxes as I type this. They're sending me packing, and I'm now looking for office space.

Sigh. One hour more. I still have a case study to write, so I'll leave you with this: